Nightmare
by alymun
Summary: Sam left for Stanford 6 months ago and Dean was sick of being unable to sleep peacefully. Fluffy little oneshot


Dean jolted awake with a muffled curse, shooting a glance to make sure his Dad was still asleep. This was becoming a recurring theme for him, a few hours of sleep interrupted by horrific nightmares. He silently slipped out of the motel room and collapsed against the impala.

It had been six months since Sam had run off to Stanford, six months since Dean had been able to sleep soundly. Every night now was a different scenario where Sam was injured, was hurting and screaming out for Dean, begging for Dean to save him and Dean couldn't get to him.

Dean clenched his fists till his knuckles went white, fighting the urge to take out his phone, to call the kid and make sure he was fine. He wouldn't put his problem on Sammy's shoulders, not when Sam was trying so hard to be normal. No, he would find a way to deal with it on his own.

In all honesty, Dean was proud of Sam. Proud that he not only got into one of the best schools with a full scholarship, but also that he had stood up to their Dad and fought for it. Though he wished that he had done it a little more respectfully. But his Dad and brother were too similar to calmly work out a plan. No with them it was always yelling and stomping. Dean didn't see why Sam couldn't go to university and still talk to them and if it was just Dad's orders not to call Sam, he would have disobeyed long ago. But Sam had asked him not to and he would respect his baby brother's wishes. That conversation had killed Dean a little bit but he knew his brother and when he thought it through he understood Sam's reasoning. Sam wanted a chance… he didn't want to hear about monsters or remember the years spent hunting them. Maybe it would be different if their Dad hadn't slammed the door between them, but he did. Making Sam decide between a normal life, something Sam had always longed for or hunting with a Dad who didn't understand him. It was no wonder Sam picked school. Dean would be a cruel reminder of the life that was no longer open to him. Sam also knew their Dad gave the order for Dean not to talk to him and he wouldn't want to cause any more strife between Dean and their Dad.

Dean's body still traitorously shook from the vividness of his dream. He had been tied to a chair while Sam screamed in agony behind him. He hadn't been able to see what was happening behind him but the sound of his little brother begging and babbling incoherently was bad enough. Then the generic begging became pleas for Dean to do something, anything… to save him…to kill him and still Dean was unable to rip the lungs out of whatever was hurting him. He could just sit there, listening to his brother break while the monster laughed.

John opened the motel door and studied his oldest. Dean was leaning against the impala with his eyes clenched closed. He hated how much the past 6 months had affected him… his face was pale, deep bags under his eyes and even the joy Dean got out of everything was gone. He looked at hunting as a job now and rarely flirted with the various women they met. John missed the carefree attitude of his son and knew the loss was his fault. When Sam had first brought up leaving for school all John felt was fear. Fear that his youngest would be out of his reach, out of his protection. That fear brought out the anger and he was comfortable with anger so that's what was shown. He accused his son of deserting them, of not caring about them or his mom and in that fit of rage came out the ultimatum, the ultimatum that destroyed his older boy. If you leave, don't ever come back.

Through that whole fight Dean stood by, trying to break them apart, thinking only of the two of them. But neither of them thought about Dean. They didn't think of how he lived for them and how their anger would tear Dean apart. No, they lost their heads and now their foolish pride stopped them from reconciling and Dean paid the price. Well he was still foolish, unable to reach out to his youngest and admit fault, but he could help his eldest. John turned back inside, packed their bags and threw them into the trunk. The familiar sound of the trunk shutting jolted Dean out of his head and he looked up at his Dad, appalled that he hadn't been aware of his surroundings.

"Lets go Dean." John ordered, climbing in with his son quick behind him. John hid a smile, thinking of how Sam would have insisted on knowing where they were going and why before making a move towards the car. They'd only been driving for 10 minutes when Dean fell asleep and John turned the music down slightly, glad Dean was getting some much needed sleep.

Dean jolted awake to his Dad shaking his shoulder. He sat up and studied the view outside of the window. "Dad?" He asked hesitantly, wondering why they were at Stanford.

"I've got to meet with someone nearby. Figured that in a university town, you could find a bar or something to amuse yourself for 24 hours." John said gruffly.

Dean grinned, "You sure you don't want back up?" already planning where to find Sammy.

"Kid, I can take care of myself. Now go. You deserve a break." John said, staring out the windshield. He listened as Dean grabbed his bag and shut the door, before driving away quickly.

Sam happily walked out of his last lecture for the day, chatting with one of his new friends. Then he heard the familiar intro of Back in Black and immediately his mind flipped to Dean. He regretted telling Dean not to call. When he said it he was thinking that he couldn't handle reminders of Dean but so much reminded him of his big brother. He'd hear a familiar song, see a nice old car or even see a hot woman and Dean's voice would be there, making a crude joke. He thought again of calling his brother but he was scared of being rejected by one of the few people who mattered to him. Thinking of Dean… that guy looked an awful lot like him.

Dean had spotted Sam leaving his lecture hall. It had taken no time at all to track him down, he'd had Sam's schedule memorized since the first week of classes and Gigantor over there stood out from any crowd. He hadn't planned on Sam seeing him but apparently his little brother's senses were still good and he found himself making eye contact across the field. Next thing he knew he had an armful of Sam. Normally they refrained from chick flick moments, but damn it had been a long six months. After a few seconds he pulled back and did a quick study of his brother, determining that his brother was in one piece and the last bits of the nightmare disappeared.

Then a look of panic filled Sam's face. "What's wrong? Why are you here? Is it Dad? Is he hurt? Oh god, I left and he got injured…" Sam started ranting.

Dean quickly interrupted his brother. "Whoa there Sam. Dad's fine. He's just meeting someone nearby. Seriously we aren't helpless without you. Everything is fine Sammy."

Sam took a deep breath and calmed his racing heart. "It's Sam. Jerk."

"Bitch." Dean replied with a grin.

Sam grinned at his big brother. "I missed you Dean. You can call me occasionally now."

Dean wanted to hug the brat again but he had his reputation to look out for, so he sighed dramatically. "Fine Samantha. If you can't sleep without hearing my voice, I suppose I could call once in awhile. Just for you."

Sam smiled knowingly, able to see the circles under Dean's eyes but played along. Besides his nights hadn't been dream free lately either.


End file.
